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change, feel, heatherwilliamson, ice, journalism, kaosaelee, life, love, pawsitivechange, prison
The following story is about Kao Saelee. A man kidnapped by ICE. After serving 22 years, he’s now in a detention facility in Louisiana pending deportation. He was part of The Pawsitive Change Program who brings shelter dogs into prisons and the lives of incarcerated men. The men teach these dogs. You can also say the dogs teach them, but what takes place is so extraordinary, so powerful, it’s one of my lifelines, a compass if you will, for how to live. I’m talking about connection, 2-legged and four, most notably, building a relationship with yourself. I don’t always feel connected, but this opportunity to write about Saelee breathed life back into me. That’s what real power does; it gives. Most times, without knowing, but always freely. Saelee is one of numerous from The Pawsitive Change Program, invoking harmony. He’s an “Essential Worker” because he, like the others from this program, is the message, the change, the life, the true currency, the real “thing” baby. Kao Saelee and the rest of the Pawsitive Change men are teachers and guides, just like the animal people, and what I learn with them is how to tame me, but never my soul.
Mind this, when in doubt, I ask self, Is this necessary? I now ask you the same. Is this necessary? Is it necessary to deport Kao Saelee? I don’t believe it is, so let’s begin…
September 24th, 2020. It’s around 10 PM. I’ve been outside contemplating what to write ever since I got off the phone with Saelee’s sister, Julie, earlier this evening. The weather is calm; it’s a lovely night, stars sparkling, trees gently waving, all is quiet, besides the coyotes in the distance and my mind. I must get this right. I pour myself another cup of coffee and sit. It’s time to write. It’s time to call upon whatever “IT” is to sit by my side. It’s time to rid me. Sometimes you have to do this, live for another so you can live for yourself.
THE CHANGE WE ALL WISH TO SEE IS ABOUT TO BE DEPORTED.
It makes no sense to me, but neither does society. I can’t stop thinking; I wish Saelee were able to enjoy this night too. So why isn’t he?
“My brother is way more than I can say.” Julie told me before our chat ended. Tell me about him. Is he ok? Are you? SO MANY QUESTIONS, yet the one in the forefront is why he’s in Pine Perry Ice Detention in Louisiana? He’s been in there since August 6th, the day he was released from prison after serving time, a long time, 22 years to be exact. Why was Saelee discarded again? I know I’m not the only one asking this question. Even if I think I know the answer, I’m challenging it because, as someone told me once, “Answers carry much dust.”
Here’s the update on Saelee’s situation:
ICE’s course of action thus far: No date yet.
Court date hearing: Rescheduled 3 TIMES due to weather
Tentative new court date is September 29th, 2020.
“He’s in good spirits besides bad food always. He’s very thankful for video chat.” I feel Julie’s concern, appreciation, fear, as well as guilt, reflection, and in her words, “All this has made me think. We don’t know what to say.”
Check it; the mantra of scriptwriting is, “Show. Don’t tell.” I apply it to the way I live, and I speak up when I see it in others. I see it in Saelee, and my wish is for you to see it too. It’s called integrity, and integrity can be risky these days. Perhaps it’s always been. Who knew, “To Thine Own Self Be True” is a lifelong rite(s) of passage, meaning we don’t stay the same; we’re transformative. It’s our nature to become… And rid. Over and over. Again and again.
Growing up was a long and arduous journey for Julie, the youngest of four, and Saelee, her older brother, she called “The Protector.” Saelee was born in Laos; his family relocated to America when he was a young boy. Julie and Saelee’s parents had a hard time knowing how to raise them in America. “They wouldn’t acknowledge anything good we did. All I remember our parents saying about Saelee was ‘He’s bad, bad, bad.'”
You know, if you tell someone the same thing over and over again, most likely they’ll believe you. That’s why it’s a must to choose wisely. What we tell others and what we tell ourselves. Who we listen to, and who we don’t.
When Saelee went to prison at 18, Julie was a young girl, unable to grasp the totality of 25 TO LIFE, Saelee’s plea bargain. “When you come from poverty, they don’t care. His trial was not fair.” What led up to Saelee’s sentence, in my opinion, was a lack of guidance. Stability is crucial for a child; I know this because I didn’t have it much after my grandmother died. When you grow up not having guidance, you learn from what’s around you. You often make many mistakes because you’re trying to find guidance and don’t know what’s right or wrong. Trial and error are difficult for adults; look at the “State” of things. Now imagine a child trying to figure it all out when he’s told everything he does is terrible. I won’t go into my opinion of the “Judicial System” at this time.
Julie and Saelee’s relationship ceased to exist for nearly 15 years after his incarceration. What happened when they reconnected? “SO MUCH GROWTH!” When they bonded, Julie says she recognized the little boy inside who never got a chance to grow (up). A little boy who used to get beat up and bullied for just going to get groceries. “I don’t feel he’s ever had a chance.”
Kao Saelee has over 40 certificates of completions while incarcerated: Pawsitive Change Program, Food Safety and Sanitation, Inmate Counsel Project, Alternative Violent Project (AVP), and The State of California Sierra Conservation Center Forest Fire Training Program, to name a few. He’s learned to fight fires and train dogs. Love himself and show others they can too. We need this. We need people who are true to themselves and make it happen when most doubt they can, especially when failure is force-fed. They’re valuable to this country and for our world. Not everyone opens themselves up. To reveal things you’ve done and wouldn’t do now is admirable.
What would you like people to know about your brother? “Saelee’s a hard worker, and right now in his life, he wants to be part of society and give back,” I then ask what Saelee wants to do with his life, “Maybe one day be a mentor to youth.” THE KIDS. Saelee is willing to be here for the kids, are you? Sometimes that’s all that keeps me going. K I D S. Saelee is interested in becoming someone he never had growing up. So why are we stunting Saelee’s growth? His experiences shaped the person he is today, which can help others. His life is valuable. Why not let Saelee stay? The USA is the only home he’s ever known. Why not let Saelee remain where he’s supported by MANY because he’s worked diligently to improve and be of service? Why not let Saelee remain here, in the USA, where his sister supports him wholeheartedly? His primary support was born. Why not let Saelee stay because he wants to? His family is here. 2-legged and four.
Listen, sometimes reality is messy, but how do we know what to clean if it ain’t for the mess(es)? I’ll tell you what can come from a mess, wisdom, and the people in this world can use all the wisdom they can get. I hope you’re listening because you have a man who’s willing to give in the land of the taking. And he’s about to be banished.
People want to change the world, but Kao Saelee changed worlds within. Have you? I believe the soul desires to advance. I want Saelee to take pleasure in the results of his work. My wish is for him to live while he’s here, not survive, and I feel the point in life, if there is one, is connection, not exile.
xx-h-> http://www.goldsrite.com
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*Images courtesy of Pawsitive Change @pawsitivechange